Be responsible for life

Life is a kind of despair. Not in despair born again, he died in despair (Diablo iii PowerLeveling). Life goes on, and pain are in. since when do not know, I like to look at the sky. Looking at it blue clear, blue purity. I think it is the world's most pure place. I so had been look to it. Until the tears flowed. Often such, looked up at the sky, and silently. Thoughts violently, missing heavy. When I deeply sentimentally attached to the earth. Also wondering when I would leave. Remember friends once said to me, even if a tree grass also can't give up easily survive, because the sun, because the heart, because of the earth feeding it. Don't know when, and the person's distance so far. Also don't know when, I am not live your life. Sometimes, we will think of suicide. I would imagine that when I jump from tall buildings, will fly feeling. Or, when I use the knife will own wrist artery cut off, the moment of the blood flow. I will not free. Often, I'll lean on at the window, looking at the blue sky, thinking about these problems, a want to is all day. Until the sun goes down to the west, the clouds of the fire burning, So the blazing, solemn and stirring like that, and so desolate. At this moment, mom saw it, always said to me, don't see, quick to eat. She is the best mother in the world. But, she won't life time all follow me. Whenever I hear Angela's "invisible wings", it is very moving. Every time in wander alone in strong, every time even if very hurt also don't flash tears. Every time I met with cruel treatment. I will be in the heart tell yourself, you want to be strong, you want brave, in order to mom. I no longer want to hover movement, also no longer crisp fragile weak, because the life does not need these. Face up to life, not to run away from life.